Blotter: Stroller spat and parkour failure 

BLOTTER O' THE WEEK: In a fight over a stroller, one woman threw a baby bottle at another, splattering milk on her pants in the process. The victim then began to cry over ... well, you know.

Vague Slang Term for Marijuana o' the Week: "Stuff."

Someone fired a bullet straight through two walls of an apartment complex office. Gotta hate those thin walls.

Police got a call one morning about "a suspicious moped" parked near a batting cage in a city park. It hadn't been reported stolen, but it had some major damage near the battery compartment where someone had apparently tried to pry the plastic off. The moped was towed to a city parking lot, where it remains a total mystery.

Somewhere in Charleston, a little boy is singing the blues after his alto saxophone was stolen from the backseat of his mother's car.

A high school student received about 50 threatening or degrading text messages from someone with the e-mail handle bitcheswillbebitches.

A man called police to report the theft of a power drill, watches, shoes, and a samurai sword from his home.

After moving his car to avoid getting booted for a parking violation, a man drove up to a parking enforcement officer and spit on her vest. When she asked the man if he had a mother, he spit on her again.

A man who smelled like he'd been doing some boozing stood outside a car dealership and peed his pants. When the cops arrived, he told them, "I'll be honest, I couldn't make it to the bathroom inside the store."

The Things They Shoplifted: Two bags of jumbo shrimp, a bottle of steak seasoning, and a pack of black socks.

Someone has been stealing rent checks from an apartment complex dropbox by pushing them out the top with a stick inserted through holes in the bottom of the box. What this person has been doing with checks made out to a landlord remains uncertain.

Drunk Quote o' the Week: "I love what you do. I love the police."

A daredevil who tried dropping down to the sidewalk from a second-story apartment balcony ended up catching the first-floor railing with his legs and landing on his back. Yet another promising parkour career cut short by gravity.

The Blotter is taken from City of Charleston police department reports. We've added a cartoon and a little commentary. We've added a little humor, too. No one has been found guilty. This is not a court of law.


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