Ah, the booty call. It's probably as old as the invention of booze. There's nothing like drinking yourself into a stupor at a succession of bars, libating your libido into a lather, then finally finding yourself alone at the end of the night and sending out a phone feeler to see if a recent former hookup is equally as drunk, horny, and — let's face it — desperate as you are.
These days, though, drinking and dialing is passé. With the proliferation of text messaging, Blackberrys, and iTap English, the booty call has evolved into the vastly superior booty text. No longer do callers run the slurry risk of sounding too drunk to be sincere (or worse, to perform). Texting is the great equalizer: everyone comes across as drunk in the grammar of text messaging. Here, though, it works to your advantage. After 2 a.m., the tone of the smart booty text will avoid blatant propositioning or the description of specific sexual acts. Remember: if for any reason you're turned down, you want to preserve plausible deniability. Therefore the most effective BT is one in which you're simply "tchng base" to see if the potential booty "hd a gd time 2nite?" and if he/she's "stll up" and wants to "hng out?"