As Valentine's Day rolls around this year, how many of us will be spending another evening with dashed expectations, feeling unloved and unappreciated? Screw that. We've put together a primer to help you navigate the world of love and sex (toys). So don't waste another minute feeling lonely. You can't meet anyone if you're sitting on the couch watching porn and nursing a bottle of Southern Comfort, so get out there and get busy. Our Love & Sex guide will lead you through stupid shit, like some award-winning porn titles, to useful stuff, like buying sex toys. And if you're really sick to death of all this love crap, join us at the Mellow Mushroom's F-Cupid party, where we'll be bemoaning failed relationships and hating on love in a booze-drenched atmosphere that's sure to prepare you for a new relationship — which we'll be happy to help you find with our new City Paper Meet Market online (how's that for a shameless plug?).