Ho¯M's innovative idea to bring a ping-pong bar to Upper King Street is one we have to applaud. But somebody's got to do something about the table tennis sign-up rules. They work a little something like this: Players can reserve a 30-minute time slot on a first come, first serve basis. They must not leave the bar afterward, and calling ahead is not allowed, both of which are respectable rules. If the next names on the list aren't present when their time comes, the two prior may remain on the table for another half-hour. If it was your name, you're stuck watching Tweedledee and Tweedledum whack it back and forth for another 30 minutes while you suck down your bourbon and diet. Womp, womp.