Us reporter types never say no to a good meal. With our paltry paychecks and our penchant for working all hours of the day, we rarely ever get to feast. Which is why PR folks have learned that if you want the press to come to your ribbon-cutting ceremony, you better be serving some food. And it doesn't matter if it's a warehouse cheese-and-cracker platter or a catered meal from Cru Catering. We'll show up. We hate to say it, but if Ken Burger invited us to share a bite at lunch, then, well, we'd have to turn him down, because whoever cooked that meal or slapped together that sandwich probably spat a loogie into it. Why? Burger wrote one of the most controversial columns we've ever read, ripping apart nearly everyone working in the F&B industry. Bad move, Ken. It reminds us of Groundhog Day when Phil Connors tried to avoid the insurance salesman and stepped into a puddle, again and again and again. And like Phil, we hope Burger learns his lesson. But even if he does, we would still advise him to stay away from the she-crab soup from now on.