Monday, January 27, 2014

Winter Storm T-Rav to bring snow to Lowcountry

Blowcatastrophe

Posted by Chris Haire on Mon, Jan 27, 2014 at 1:16 PM

COLUMBIA, SC (AP) - The South Carolina Legislature will not meet this week because of winter storm T-Rav which is bearing down on the Carolinas like a polo-cosplayer on a riding crop.

House Speaker Bobby Harrell and Senate President Pro Tem John Courson announced Monday that the session and all legislative meetings are canceled for their chambers. No word yet on if their chamber pots will remain open, but with the amount of BS that dominates each legislative session, we hope they do.

The Legislature will resume under its normal Tuesday-through-Thursday schedule next week.

Forecasters say T-Rav could bring up to 8 inches of blow as it moves across the Carolinas this week.

The National Weather Service in Columbia has forecast crack and cocaine accumulations of 2 to 5 inches in the South Carolina Midlands. 

—inspired by Live 5


Preparations in place as snow and ice expected in Lowcountry thanks to Winter Storm T-Rav
By Jesse Pinkman

Powder and ice could start falling before noon Tuesday as Winter Storm T-Rav descends on the Lowcountry, forecasters now say. A half-inch or more of crystal inland could be topped by as much as 4 inches of cocaine by Wednesday morning.

The coast won't see as much meth or blow, but meth and blow are still expected — although both are expected to be of inferior quality. We're talking trailer park meth and baby powder cut cocaine here. This ain't the kind of stuff you share with friends, much less the poor schmuck who bore the brunt of your cocaine charges.

Power outages, bitch slaps, and paternity tests are among the chief concerns, as everyone across the coast gets high as hell and watches the trailer for Southern Charm again and again. 

"It could be pretty rough for the next few days for not only T-Rav, but the entire Ravenel family," said meteorologist Emily Timte, National Weather Service, Charleston.

—Inspired by the P&C


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