Thursday, March 21, 2013

R.I.P. Harry Reems: A tribute to the best porn star names

Remembering a giant

Posted by Chris Haire on Thu, Mar 21, 2013 at 1:32 PM

Today we remember a legend.

A giant among men.

A man with a long, long schlong.

Harry Reems.

Looking like the lovechild of Groucho Marx and the Camel cigarette man, Reems first exploded on the silver screen with 1972's porn classic Deep Throat. And while he was unable to maintain the career longevity of Ron Jeremy, Reems will always be remember for his wicked wit, his bushy stache, and his killer stage name. Without him, the porn world would be far less frisky and fun.

So without further adieu, a brief list of the best porn star names, after Harry Reems of course.

1. Peter North. For the longest time, I didn't get it. But it was right in my face all along. Peter. Pointing North. Priceless.

2. Christy Canyon. This is one canyon that many a man has fallen into.

3. Lexington Steele. This is hard one to beat.

4. Jeanna Fine. For a good spot in the '80s, Jeanna was the bees knees of the business of being on her knees.

5. Linda Lovelace. Linda may have loved lace — not to mention Mr. Reems Wild Moustache Ride — but she turned on the porn industry in the '80s and went all fundie.

6. Sasha Grey. Tori Black. Jennifer White. The only three colors you ever need to know.

7. Jeff Stryker. Stryker was a man of swift and sudden action, a one-man strike force of bang-bang boogie.

8. Nikki Sexx. A crude pun on the name of Motley Crue's bassist and principle songwriter but as effective as caplet of amyl nitrate.

9. Traci Lords. Although her reign was brief, for a while Lords was the queen of the porn world.

10. T.T. Boy. Um, we won't even go there. On second thought, it's the worst name ever.

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